I was going to start this off by asking “do you like cats?” but then I changed my mind because I don’t care. I don’t care because I like cats and I am being afforded the privilege of writing this article which means my opinion is the one that reigns supreme. You know those circles you have to sit in when you’re having a lemon-squeeze and only the person that’s holding the stick gets to talk? Well right now I have the stick so guess what? Now that you’re done trying to talk over me (unsuccessfully) I want to tell you about this cute little cat game.
I stumbled across this adorable illustrated game developed by Australian artist Alexander Perrin. Hmm, what’s that? I see you raising your hand so I’m going to pass you the stick.
You want to know what the game is about? I will gladly tell you. Thank you for respecting the big stick rule.
The game is appropriately named Short Trip because that’s exactly what it is. In the game there is a cute (objectively, yes) little cat, he drives a tram through his town. For all intents and purposes I’m going to call this cat Blake because he looks like he would choose the name Blake if cats were allowed to make those kind of decisions in our society but unfortunately we rob domesticated animals of that kind of agency so lol his name is Blake. Blake is wearing a double breasted cape and he does not have time for your shit. He loves driving the tram and has been doing it for a number of years, ever since the previous conductor had to skip town because his wife decided to put a hit out on him due to his (frequent) infidelity. No, none of this storyline is actually true but remember what I mentioned about holding the big stick? Ok let’s continue.
The town is beautifully illustrated and all of the little kitties look somber. Like, content-somber not sad-somber. Listen, these cats are stylish as fuck too ok? They wear adorable little top coats and boots it’s really so fucking precious please play this game. Using your left and right arrows (and the spacebar for the bell), YOU (I am pointing at you through your screen), are responsible for helping Blake help all of the cute cats of the town get from one place to another.
All of these cats are grown ass adults who have places that they need to be. In my mind, there’s one who is a single mother headed to the market. There’s another who just his quit his job and is headed to the bar to have a drink— you know boss ass cat shit like that. While these cats may not look like they are in a rush (TO YOU) please do not disrespect their time by leaving the game idle. Pick. Them. Up. And. Drop. Them. Off. when you see these little stations:
If you’ve made it this far into the story and still don’t understand why you should play this game, I just have to ask, who continues to read things that they are not interested in? Are you seriously hate reading an article about a cat game? You’ve already given me this much of your time, might as well play the game just saying.
In this paragraph I will make an argument that you cannot resist. Unlike all of the other stupid games you probably play, nothing bad happens in this game. No, you can not run the cats over. There is no blood. The tram doesn’t wreck at any point. There aren’t two big cats on the tram that bump into each other by mistake and spiral into a claw throwing frenzy at 8am while you’re just trying to sit and and enjoy a strawberry frosted donut from Dunkin on your way to 72nd Street. It’s chill and some of you (read: me) need more chill in your life.
Please enjoy this game as you sit at work pretending to be productive or even in the bathroom stall as you hide from your manager who is eager for you to send over the agenda for yet another meeting that could have really just been an email. Is there an award show for video games? If there is not an award show for games there should be and this game should win best overall. If you don’t believe me at this point it’s because you haven’t played the cat game and I honestly don’t understand why I’m being taken for granted right now. Am I not enough for you? This game is bigger than cats. If you can’t see that then you don’t deserve this cat game. So no cat game for you. Ugly.